How to get away with crime: Be good looking
- tomis152b
- Jan 4
- 1 min read
After Luigi Mangione recived praise around the world for his alleged assasination of a Fortune 500 CEO, criminals seem to have discovered the key to committing crime: Being good looking. "The reason why so many criminals get caught is because they are ugly," said anonymus criminal John Radny.
"Part of what makes people view Adolf Hitler so negatively—aside from the extinction of millions of innocent people—is that he wasn't much of a looker," remarked Radny.
When informed that Luigi is likely facing the death penalty and did not actually get away with his crime, Radny replied, "But he is liked, which is far more important than living."
Radny is not alone with his sentiment. Most criminals, it seems, just want to be liked. "I shot and killed him because I wanted him to like me," stated Lugi in court.
In response to this new discovery, criminals around the world are now working on their glow-ups, adopting regular exercise routines, healthier diets and even botox.